Setting: August 4, 2025 — Aldi checkout line, where teeth cost more than groceries
In our family, molars don’t fall out — they make an exit with financial consequences.
Caleb lost a tooth today. A molar, to be exact. And as usual, I didn’t have any cash. The Tooth Fairy is many things, but prepared is not one of them. So off I went to Aldi, the nearest cash-back-friendly establishment, with the sole intention of buying something small and grabbing a fiver.
But I never go into grocery stores anymore. I usually do delivery, which means I haven’t been physically inside a snack aisle in months. So I went a little… feral.
This looks good! That looks good! Do we need these new fancy cookies? No. Did I get them anyway? Absolutely. I even grabbed two new varieties of potato chips for the family to taste-test — Brazilian barbecue and Korean barbecue, for science. (Brazil won, 3–2, in a tightly contested match.)
Anyway, I finally made it to checkout with a cart full of (mostly) junk, feeling like a raccoon who had just raided a gas station. I asked for $5 in cash back. The cashier said the minimum was $20.
So I got twenty.
I spent forty-two.
And that, dear reader, is how my child’s tooth ended up costing me $62.
Worth it. For the tooth, the chips, and five minutes of believing in magic.
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| Holden + chips |
This post is part of my One-Minute Memoir series — short reflections on small moments that still manage to say something big.
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